4/28 Show Entry

I have entered a show that was listed in The Center for Fine Art Photography. It is an international call for entries for a show called Dreams.

THEME:

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Dreams

Dreams are a creation of images, ideas, sensations and emotions that occur in our conscious and subconscious mind. They can be the manifestation of our aspirations, goals, andfears both realistic and fantastic.

JUROR:

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Aline Smithson

Aline Smithson has been the Gallery Editor for Light Leaks magazine, writes and edits the blog, Lenscratch, and has curated exhibitions for a number of galleries and on-line magazines. Smithson is a national reviewer of photography and is a contributing writer of Diffusion, Too Much, Chocolate, Lucida, and F Stop Magazine. Her photographs have been featured in numerous publications including the PDN Photo Annual, Communication Arts Photo Annual, Eyemazing, Artworks, Shots, Pozytyw, and Silvershotz magazines. Her work has widely been exhibited nationally in museums and galleries.

idea 4/13 - Time

Time.

It's expressed in a linear fashion, but does it really move in that format?

Time is a theme that seems to be overwhelming my series this semester. Both conceptually and throughout the process. The entire series itself is a reflection upon my past and where it has led me to this point.

This Point.

Maybe that is where my mental/creative block is coming from. I have been solely creating memories from my past, which though there may seem like a lot... in reality I am 21 years old and have barely experienced life.

What if I was to create "memories from the future"? How would that affect my series and how the audience reacts to it? What would I include? How would I justify each image as holding the same importance of events I have actually experienced and learned from already? If time only is represented in a linear fashion, but infacts moves in all directions then who is to say that I can't produce images of things I have yet to experience but still anticipate experiencing?

My work this semester is so time based, that it makes me wonder where it is safe to end my series. Whether I should end it at present day, before present day but at a pivotal life moment, or somewhere I have not had the opportunity to explore yet.

As the semester draws to a close, I am full of all sorts of anticipations of where my life is headed and how much time I have for this and that. I feel this subject is something I have to address in my series. I'm just not really sure how to go about it.

Visiting Artist - Trevor Paglen

Trevor Paglen

When Trevor Paglen first started talking about his work, I was immediately lost. I was a bit concerned that I may indeed be in the wrong lecture. I'm not going to lie, there were moments in the lecture where I wanted to ask "is this a government lesson or is this an artist lecture?" It was not until the end that my questions were answered. Paglen spent an admirable amount of time researching his concept and photographing methods. But I question wether or not going through half an hour on Government Secrecy was necessary before getting to his art. But then again "would his art stand alone, without explaination" is what one student questioned.

As far as Paglen's art goes, I am especially fond of his work using high powered telescopes to photograph locations you cannot get to. The images are beautiful in a very backwards way. You end up seeing a town, or a power plant, but the way the light starts to bend in the image creates this hazy and dream-like quality that I am really fond of. Paglens lecture definitely sparked my imagination on what is in my photographs that I am not able to see with the naked eye.

Artist 4/3 - Brian Ulrich

Brian Ulrich - Photographer

http://notifbutwhen.com/

Brian Ulrich is an artist born in New York in 1971. He got BFA at the University of Akron and his MFA in photography at Columbia College Chicago. His work has been included in many publications such as Aperture, The Chicago Tribune, and The New York Times. Ulrich has also been displayed in many museums and group and solo shows.

I am a big fan of Brian Ulriches work for many reasons. From the aesthetic to the concept, I feel very engaged with his work. I find his work very inspiring to the work I am doing and the work that I generally produce. Though Ulrich and I have vastly different aesthetic appeal, we have one underlying factor: human interaction. I think that is why I thoroughly enjoy Ulriches work. Because he appeals to my curiosity of humanity and human interaction. I really enjoy his images without people in them as well. There's something profound about the absence of human presence. It causes wonder and forces the viewer to create a short narrative about why people are not in the frame and where they might be. I have done the same in my work in the past and have contemplated doing the same in my new series. Though I feel with this series it would not produce the effect I am working for.

"...not just the changing retail landscape, but also the change in our economy and an economic model that has been in place since the mid-20th century. It's an economy based on disposable goods, and a society that has a continual influx of leisure time and cash to spend on new stuff. But things are changing and happening so fast, it's insane. Literally, timing the photography of a lot of these sites and locations is key -- the places get bulldozed."

Apple, Lauren. An Interview With Brian Ulrich. Chicagoist. http://chicagoist.com/2009/04/17/post_12.php. April 2009. Web.

"The idea went back to 2005 when I drove weekly past a large closed supermarket on the North Side of Chicago. At night the space really transformed from one of neglect and misuse to something incredibly visual that described a Rothko-esque painting space divided in three parts (parking lot, building, and sky). I spent a few nights making some photographs to try and replicate what I saw. I had been working on a larger project dealing with American consumerism, and it was no surprise to me that these spaces would fail and dwindle as fast they arise. I was in the midst of a deeper project, photographing in thrift stores and recycling shops as part of my “Copia” series, so I shelved the idea."

Samadzadeh, Nozlee. Ghosts of Shopping Past. The Morning News. http://www.themorningnews.org/archives/galleries/ghosts_of_shopping_past/ December 2009. Web.

idea 3/30 - personality

I've been realizing of late that my series has a lot to do with personality. It ranges from experiences that shape my personality, to the personality that the series itself it takes on. I've also found that in a way it reads as multiple personality disorder (or dissociative identity disorder). I find that this last aspect has an interesting relation the my series. I mean, I am in fact playing each individual "character" within the scene. So while at first I read as different people in each image, upon closer look you begin to realize that each one is me. Which then raises the question of "which one really is me?" or even which experience is really mine?

"Dissociative identity disorder (previously known as multiple personality disorder) is a fairly common effect of severe trauma during early childhood, usually extreme, repetitive physical, sexual, and/or emotional abuse"

WebMD. Dissociative Identity Disorder (Multiple Personality Disorder). http://www.webmd.com/mental-health/dissociative-identity-disorder-multiple-personality-disorder

I found it really interesting that WebMD states that D.I.D. is usually the effect of severe trauma during childhood considering I have been picking some traumatic memories of my past to recreate. The article goes on to say that a majority of the population experiences mild dissociation such as "daydreaming or getting lost in the moment while working on a project." Though the disorder itself is a more severe manifestation of a distinct mental process "which produces a lack of connection in a person's thoughts, memories, feelings, actions, or sense of identity."

To clarify, I am not stating that I myself suffer from Dissociative  Identity Disorder/ Multiple Personality Disorder. I am merely touching on the idea that my work this semester manifests itself in a state that is similar. It almost presents itself that way to the viewer and manipulates the viewers mind to confuse themself on what area or "character" that they relate to or view the image as.

Learning about this disorder, I believe, will help me to further shape the "personality" that my work is taking on. I'm excited to add this onto my research for what will become my final work.

artist 3/28 Blake Ogden

Blake Ogden

http://www.ogdenpictures.com/

 

I really enjoy Blake Ogdens work for many reasons. First off I really love the nostalgic feel that it creates when you are looking at his images. I also love the personification in some of the images that is created with the objects that he photographs. These images create somewhat of a narrative within the work that makes you wonder what the story is behind these objects. Ogden builds a relationship between the objects, himself, and the viewer that is unique.

Ogden's been in many solo exhibitions and publications. Some of which include The Photo Review  in 2001 and 2000, Plates to Pixels Magazine   in 2009, and Intimate History in 2009 to name a few.

The reflection on the past is what really draws me to Ogdens work however. I feel that in theme it may be similar to my own work this semester. Also the way he shows relationship between the dolls in two of the pictures is similar to the concept of relationship within my own work.

"I prefer to work with film. My black and white work is printed conventionally in a chemical darkroom, while my color work is scanned from film and then out put as digital pigment prints."

Art Review. http://www.artreview.com/profile/BlakeDOgden. 2011. Web.

3/24 Show Entry

I entered 3 pieces into the Anderson Gallery show. These are my images that I submitted.

And here are my entry receipts:

idea 3/24 self portraiture

Self portraiture.

What is the purpose behind an artist putting their physicality inside of their work? What does that accomplish? And how does that effect the viewer?

There is something that begins to happen within ones work when they chose themselves as the subject matter. That happening is both different to the viewer and the artist, but both still have a unique experience. There is something interesting that appears within an image when it is just me and the camera alone in the room. A vulnerability that would not have shown through had a third person been brought in. We get comfortable. We are no longer thinking about what someone is going to think when they see this image and start to interact with the camera in a much more intimate way.

This effects the viewer too. A connection is made between subject and audience that is not usually made when the equation is a photographer + camera + model. You begin to sense that you are witnessing something that you were never meant to see. It's better than acting and better than modeling because the sense of being watched is not there and therefore there is no acknowledgement of the camera. This was essential to my work. So much that I had to ban anyone from entering or even being near my shoots, so that I could produce the most authentic sense of the situation that was being recorded. There is no acknowledgement of the camera in my images, no direct connection with the viewer. Not even through body language.

But who really benefits from this? The artist or the viewer? Or both? There is a moment of total freedom within the span of time that you are capturing yourself on film,  on paper, etc. You stop acting and just become the part, the moment that is playing out before you. So again I ask, to whose benefit is this?

"A self-portrait is a representation of an artist, drawn, painted, photographed, or sculpted by the artist. Although self-portraits have been made by artists since the earliest times, it is not until the Early Renaissance in the mid 15th century that artists can be frequently identified depicting themselves as either the main subject, or as important characters in their work."

wikipedia. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Self-portrait. web.

Artist 3/21 - Cindy Sherman

Cindy Sherman

Cindy Sherman is a New York based photographer born in 1954. She studied at Buffalo State College, originally interested in painting but continued on her work through film and photography. Sherman's main subject matter is herself. She creates self portraits portraying different personas and assumed roles. Many would try to label her work as feminist, though she would not.

I am incredibly drawn to the work of Cindy Sherman because of her basic principles of self portraiture. I've realized that my work has many parallels to hers. She also uses herself as the only model and acts out roles to be portrayed in her images. One main difference between our works is that my situations are not fabricated, and along with acting out other personas I also often portray myself within the images. I find Cindy Sherman to be a great inspiration to my work, though our motives in creation and production style are different. There is something to be said about the repetition of the same face and the acting out of a character in front of a camera that tends to draw a viewer in. It stops being documentary and begins to be something more. Something alive.

"When I moved to New York, in the summer of ’77, I was trying to think of a new way to take pictures and tell a story. David Salle had been working at some sleazy magazine company where they had lots of shots of half-clothed women around, for those photo-novellas, like a cartoon but with photos. Slightly racy. It got me thinking, this cheap, throwaway image—if you just look at one, you make up your own story. "

Stevens, Mark. New York. http://nymag.com/anniversary/40th/culture/45773/. 2008. Web.

"It was exactly like that. I did try using family members or friends, and once I paid an assistant. But even when I was paying somebody, I still wanted to rush through and get them out of the studio. I felt like I was imposing on them. Also, I got the feeling that they were having fun, to a certain extent, thinking this was like Halloween, or playing dress-up. The levels I try to get to are not about the having-fun part. I also realised that I myself don't know exactly what I want from a picture, so it's hard to articulate that to somebody else - anybody else. When I'm doing it myself, I'm really just using the mirror to summon something I don't even know until I see it. "

Berne, Betsy. TATE Magazine. http://www.tate.org.uk/magazine/issue5/sherman.htm. Web.

Gagosian Gallery:

http://www.gagosian.com/artists/cindy-sherman/

idea 3/17 Duplicate

Duplicate: noun 1. A copy exactly like an original
                verb  1. To make an exact copy of
                         2.  To do or perform again. Repeat.

Duplication has been a big part of my series this semester. Infact is has almost engulfed the series entirely. The whole series revolves on the idea that I am duplicating myself as I act out several roles of myself and others. So what does this do to the viewer? This repetition begins to register in the mind of the audience before they even realize that I am the only subject matter. As long as my work is successful, it will not be an obvious first sight to see that the only subject in the images are myself, which makes the duplication that much more important. Once the viewer begins to see that there is one subject duplicated over and over they begin to question the motives of the image. Who is that person? Why are they in seperate roles? Which role is the focal point? And which role is actually her (if any)?

I've always found it important to make the viewer ask questions. If they have no questions then they have no reason to continue on with your work.

I also find it important for the viewer to not know 100% which subject is the main subject. Which one are they following throughout the series? This way they can kind of pick which area they most relate with without being told where to go or what to think within the series.

artist 3/14 Sally Mann

Sally Mann

Sally Mann is a photographer from Lexington, Virginia who mainly concentrates on the black and white image. Originally starting with her children as the main subject. Her work is controversial for the fact that she uses her children as the subjects, often nude, which makes the general public uncomfortable. Maybe that's why I love her work. For pushing people from their comfort zones into a space that they are uneasy about. I wish, however, that instead of criticising her work they would instead reflect on themselves and find out what they are doing/thinking that makes them uncomfortable.

Mann's work is beautiful, but kind of sad. It captures a nostalgia of childhood and mixes innocence with suggestiveness. It leaves the viewer confused as to how they should react and if their reaction is appropriate... and I love that about her work. The piercing stares of her children draw you into the image in a way that I have not found very often in art. You can't help staring back and becoming transfixed. Maybe that is where the discomfort comes from. I want to create the same kind of c captivity in my work, though without directly addressing the audience as her work does. I also want to be able to make people relate to my work and also feel uncomfortable when looking at it. Like they were not supposed to witness what they are viewing.

"I think the South depends on its eccentrics," she says one summer afternoon on the back porch as Jessie and Virginia weave in and out of the house. (Emmett is away at camp.) "It loves them, and it rewards them in lots of ways. This community allows itself to be scandalized by me and by my work, but they love it. What else would they do if it wasn't for me? I take being iconoclastic sort of seriously. It's my role here."

The New York Times. http://www.nytimes.com/1992/09/27/magazine/the-disturbing-photography-of-sally-mann.html?pagewanted=3. 1992. Web.

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Idea 3/3 - Autobiography

Autobiography/ Autobiographical are words that have stuck with me from the beginning of this portfolio. In a sense, these words kind of sum up the work I am producing. Though it is more universal than that. I am using my own "visual biography" to connect to others "biographies". I have been using universal themes and experiences such as loss, death, life, fear, happiness, love, lust, etc. So what does creating an autobiography out of my work really mean and say? What makes it important? Why should people care about "Sandy Swagger"... or is it even about "Sandy Swagger"?

I realize that I am using an autobiographical approach to my images, not to use it as an excuse to talk about me, but instead to bring attention to a single human life. And by bringing attention to a single human life, I expound onto other themes. I am pushing to portray that one individual out of 3 billion is significant and unique. But at the same time I am hoping to convey that no matter what your background, race, religion, or past experiences, you are not alone. That people go through good times and bad times and the world keeps moving. Hitting on both the significance and insignificance of life as a whole and as individuals. At moments I feel as though this work is becoming bigger than me, and bigger than I intended. This work started out with a curiosity to how my psyche remembered things and learning to cope with and better understand the good and bad memories I have accumulated over the years. Since then this body of work has become more about humanity, compassion, and finding importance and beauty in both the glorified moments and the worst of the worst.

I have found better understanding of myself, my past, and my life through this. I hope that the viewer will be able to experience my work in a way that makes them take a step back from the busy day to day life and look at who they are, who they were, and who they are becoming.

Artist 2/28 - Henry Darger

Henry Darger is an artist who worked much with the style of duplication and reproduction. His main occupation was that of a janitor in Chicago. He was orphaned at a fairly young age and then institutionalized. Darger has been explained as a bit of an excentric. " He has become famous for his posthumously discovered 15,145-page, single-spaced fantasy manuscript called The Story of the Vivian Girls, in What is known as the Realms of the Unreal, of the Glandeco-Angelinnian War Storm, Caused by the Child Slave Rebellion, along with several hundred drawings and watercolor paintings illustrating the story.^[2] Darger's work has become one of the most celebrated examples of outsider art." (Wikipedia).

The main reason I am looking at Dargers art, is not so much the subject matter but more the technique and aesthetic. I am also working with the aesthetic of duplication. It seems as though something starts to unfold in the mind when we are presented with patterns and similiarities, so when we use people as these patterns/repititions, what are we really creating? What is the motive of the artist when they begin duplicating? And what does the viewer begin to experience when they realize these patterns and duplications?

"Artists are always struggling with the need to keep their work inthe forefront of their life, the need to not let distractions get inthe way. Darger was so devoted, and I think creative people have agreat admiration in terms of how he worked."

P.O.V. Outsider Artist Henry Darger: An Interview with Curator Brooke Davis Anderson. May 2008. Web. http://www.nowpublic.com/culture/outsider-artist-henry-darger-interview-curator-brooke-davis-anderson

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idea 2/10 - symbols/symbolism

In my portfolio this semester, I have become hyper aware of the symbolism that I am creating within my work. These images are all significant portions of my life that I feel are mirrored in or related to experiences and emotions that every human being is capable of experiencing/feeling. I am dealing with issues such as pain, tragedy, happiness, love, lust, deterioration, etc. What I'm working with now is how to appropriately express these in my images. Obviously I do not want my work to be so explicit that it is easily solved within a minute of looking at it. So I'm playing with symbolism and mood to get the feeling across without having to say "this image is about my struggle with relationships" or "this image is about when my uncle died". Though the original subject of these images are specific to me, the outcome of the image and the way it is perceived should not be so specific but more of a hint or a general emotion.

I am struggling a lot with not putting in specific details that only pertain to me, but I fear that if I make my images so explicit it will make my work weaker. Using symbols/symbolism to intrigue the viewer and give them only hints to what the images contain I hope will allow them to be more universally relateable. And though I know it is far fetched to have work be universally relateable, I want the idea of 'humanity' to come through in these images.

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idea 2/4 - Humanity

Humanity:
1. All human beings collectively
2. The quality or condition of being human
3. The quality of being humane; kindness; benevolence
4. The humanities

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/humanity

The whole preface of my work this semester revolves around the idea of "humanity" or "being human". Psychology has always fascinated me especially when it comes to how we build relationships and why we do the things we do. When it comes down to it, we see a lot of nurture vs. nature. I'm (ofcourse) looking very intently at the "nuture" side of things. The experiences we go through shape and build our personalities, viewpoints, culture, and religious views.

I'm also really interested in an even simpler side of this, which is the idea of "just being human". Being ordinary, living through joys and struggles without the world stopping for you to figure out which direction is up or down. At the pace this world is going in, we often forget how shortlived and fragile life can be until we lose someone we love. I'm hoping to emphasize the beauty of just being alive by pulling out the moments in my life that are most significant to the person I am today, no matter how big or small. I want the message of "life goes on" to be prominent in the final series of images, and for it to show hope of tomorrow. I touch on some subjects which are uncomfortable for me to remember, recreate, and display - but the reason that I feel it is important to show these images is to represent that the hardest things to remember are often ones that are most important to our development.

"In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: It goes on."
-Robert Frost

1/31 Artist - blank

Idea 1/27 - break ups

My portfolio this semester is a continuation of my portflio last semester which reflects upon important moments within my own life. I have noticed a trend that a lot of the moments that I have been reflecting on are past romantic relationships. I'm not sure why these stand prominent above the rest. However some clarity came to me yesterday. I went through my second break up in the last 6 months. As with the last I was confronted with the feelings of confusion and a sense of regaining self. I am reevaluating the last 2 months of my life... but then again I am also reevaluating the last 6 months. What moments were important? How did things change? And with a relationship that was not clearly stated for months before becoming "official" what does that mean? Every new relationship brings a new outlook on life. And every new break up no matter what side you are on, changes your perception of everything. Needless to say with all the ups and downs of this recent relationship I think I have found two more images for my portfolio of moments that changed my life and will remain in my thoughts forever.


Tashiro, Ty. Frazier, Patricia. "I'll Never Be in A Relationship Like That Again": Personal Growth Following Romantic Relationship Breakups. 2003. Web.

This article tackles on the subject of breakups and failed relationships. It focuses on the growth of the individual no matter what side they were on (i.e. dumper or dumpee). This article studies all sorts of factors within breakups such as age, gender, social class, etc. This article also touched base on the personal growth between men and women, such as which gender felt they had grown more.

Artist - 1/24

Brandon Merkel

http://www.mustardgasparty.org/Artist.asp?ArtistID=26497&Akey=P7GJQT2H

I do not actually know a lot about Brandon Merkel or his photography. I kind of stumbled upon it recently. What really interests me about him is his aesthetic approach to his images. They capture a sort of dream like and almost nostalgic in a sense. I feel like his aesthetic in his photographs is strongly related to my concept for my series. When I look at his photographs I feel like I am looking at someones or somethings past. A vague memory of what used to be. When I am making my photographs I have that same feel of "what used to be" where things are still not clear and almost half hazy.